It’s Just A More Emphatic Way To Say SHHHHH

Yes, I KNOW this is a library. But how am I supposed to read with all this crud on the floor?

That IS the whole point of the be-quiet-at-the-library rule, isn’t it? So library patrons can concentrate? Well, there's nothing I find more distracting than a carpet full of crumbs, and dirt, and skin flakes, and plaster dust, and cocaine, and probably millions of those mites that live in books. I have some microscopic images of those mites that will keep you up nights, believe me.

So you can tell the other patrons that if they could just shut up and let me finish vacuuming, we’ll all be able to enjoy the library a little more. A few minutes of minor noise is a small price to pay for the kind of cleanliness you can only get with a motorized brushbar and Root Cyclone technology. Honestly, if you people are going to be negligent about keeping this place clean, what other choice do I have but to bring my own Dyson DC14 Vacuum to do the job that the Utica Valley Public Library system can’t be bothered to do?

Oh, is “negligent” an ugly word? Don’t like that, do you? I’ll have you know that just yesterday I sat right here and ate an entire bag of Chili-Cheese Fritos, and today, more than 24 hours later, what did I vacuum up? Here – look right here in the lifetime HEPA filter, see? – Chili-Cheese Frito crumbs! Yes, they are. YES, THEY ARE. I’ll prove it. Let me just taste one, here – ah-HA! Even mixed with all that other dust, the distinct flavor of Chili-Cheese Fritos is unmistakable! You cannot deny your squalor!

I beg your pardon, ma’am? The only thing disgusting here is your library’s neglect of basic hygiene.

Features

Authorized for SquareTrade Extended Warranty

Warranty: 6 Month Dyson

Condition: Refurbished

Features:

Designed for all floor types, this Dyson upright vacuum cleaner features a motorized brushbar that can be turned on to remove dirt and pet hair from carpets, or turned off to protect rugs and delicate floors
Root Cyclone™ technology: Patented technology that doesn’t lose suction power as you vacuum
Hygienic and quick to empty: No need to touch the dust – just push the button
Telescope Reach™ wand instantly releases and extends 17 feet for high-reach and easy stair cleaning, while the vacuum remains upright and stable
On board tools include: brush tool, crevice tool and stair tool
Brush tool: Long bristles to remove cobwebs and for delicate cleaning
Stair tool: A Dyson-designed tool for removing dust and dirt from stairs and stair carpets
Crevice tool: High velocity airflow crevice tool ideal for cleaning base boards and in-between furniture
No extra costs: All Dyson upright and canister vacuums are bagless, so there are no costly bags to replace
Lifetime HEPA filter: Removes particles down to 0.1 micron and can be washed, while its post-motor electrostatic filter, which never needs replacing, traps harmful carbon emissions from the motor
Air expelled from the unit contains up to 150 times less mold and bacteria than common breathing air
14-foot quick-draw hose
35-foot durable power cord
Wide channel for picking up larger pieces
Auto carpet-height adjustment for all types of carpet and floors
Ergonomic design with a low handle that feels lighter to carry

Specifications:
Patented Cyclone Technology:	Root Cyclone™ Technology
Suction Power:	250 AW (constant)
Stair Cleaning:	Telescope Reach™ Wand
Bin Capacity:	0.71 Gallon
Dimensions:	44.9"(H) x 14"(W) x 13.4"(D)
Max Reach:	52.4 ft
Cord Length:	35.4 ft
Weight:	18.56 lbs

In the box:

Dyson DC14 All Floors Vacuum (Choose: Satin Cyan or Yellow)
Brush tool
Stair tool
Crevice tool
Operating Manual
Quick Start Guide
Warranty Information

Specs

Dyson DC14 All Floors Vacuum with Telescoping Wand and Brush, Stair & Crevice Tools

Sales Stats

Speed to First Woot:: 4m 34.000s

Purchaser Experience

37% first woot
13% second woot
30% < 10 woots
12% < 25 woots
8% ≥ 25 woots

Purchaser Seniority

27% joined today
1% one week old
3% one month old
13% one year old
56% > one year old

Quantity Breakdown

98% bought 1
2% bought 2
0% bought 3

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

12	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11	12	1	2	3	4	5	6	7	8	9	10	11
3%	2%	1%	1%	1%	2%	4%	8%	12%	12%	9%	7%	6%	5%	4%	4%	3%	3%	3%	3%	2%	2%	2%	1%

Woots by State

zero wooters wootinglots of wooters wooting

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Dyson DC14 All Floors Vacuum

It’s Just A More Emphatic Way To Say SHHHHH

Features

Specs

Specs

Sales Stats

Purchaser Experience

Purchaser Seniority

Quantity Breakdown

Percentage of Sales Per Hour

Woots by State

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