Oh sorry honey, the passenger seat’s actually taken by Cobb Portable Stainless Steel Grill & Smoker. You’ll have to sit in the back…

“What are you talking about?”

Well, you know, I was thinking, your mother’s house is a two hour drive, and they’re expecting us there at around noon. Well, that would have meant I would have had to get up early to get the kebabs cooked just right, and they’d be cold by the time we arrived. Then it hit me: the grill is portable and can cook for 3 hours at a time! I’ll skewer-up some meat and veggies, toss on a few jalapenos for spiciness, and get some grilling done on-the-go!

“Um, Charlie, that’s crazy!”

Really? Then what’s your solution, Janice?

“I don’t know, grill when we get there? I think that’s what they mean when they say portable: bring it somewhere and use it there. Not grill while driving.”

Well first of all, neither of us work for Cobb, so let’s not jump to conclusions about what they meant based on our preconceived notions about the nature of grilling. I mean, they made it virtually smokeless after all. Who cares about smoke? People in small, enclosed spaces. Second, grills and cars are basically kindred spirits. For example, you can customize your car with sweet add-ons and options, just like you can customize your grill.

“But that’s not a reason why you need to grill in the car. It’s a reason why you think you can.”

Fine. Why don’t you give me one good reason why I shouldn’t.

“Just one? Well, for starters, it has to be illegal…”

Oh yeah? Then how come I can search the entire state of Florida’s Department of Motor Vehicle website without finding any mention of Cobb Portable Stainless Steel Grill & Smoker?

“Well, it would probably be covered under ‘distractions’ or some other blanket term…”

Shush, Janice! BE QUIET! The less I know, the less they can hold against me!

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