Remote Control Golf BallGolfers. Cheeky little wags, aren’t they? Well, here’s the perfect toy for the chirpy golfer with a sense of humour.

Okay, stop. That’s a line from the actual copy from the World Racing Nitro Green/White RC Golf Ball. Yes, we see that humour-with-a-u that means it came from “across the pond”, but we think that only makes it worse. You people invented the language over there. You freaking invented it. It is named after you. Shakespeare is one of your guys. And this is what you come up with?

Look, we know it’s a hard job. We really do. When you’re dealing with things called “The Incred-a-ball” while your friend is leaving a message about how he just made partner and wants to celebrate, that can really be crushing. But don’t just fall back on Worth its weight in 19th hole drinking we imagine! Grow a pair! Take that internal mounted gyroscope and cram it down their throats! Johnny Rotten! John Lennon! King John the Puma from that Robin Hood cartoon! John John the Piper’s Son, Stole A Pig And Away He Run!

No one is saying that this radio controlled World Racing Nitro Green/White RC Golf Ball isn’t going to be fun. When charged, it’ll spin randomly and then keep going. It’s a great prank for your dad, or your best friend, or that junior executive who keeps forgetting who really runs the company. We’re not disputing that at all. Great product, really. We just want you, the writer, to remember how good you can be.

Shake it up, unknown British guy. Even if you’re at a desk thinking you’ll never do anything more than walk to the pub. Trust us. You’re not so old. You can still change the world a little bit if you try.

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