Woot! Woot! That’s the sound of the… well, we don’t want to impersonate the police. That would be wrong.

But if you keep these red and blue Woot-Off lights in your apartment or home, and don’t use them to pull over undercover cops, it’s probably cool. This is America, after all. You can have a set of Woot-branded novelty lights for your own personal use, can’t you?

Or what if you ARE a cop? Well, then, having a spare pair of lights might come in handy! Like, if you need to jump your boat over a criminal or something like that. We assume boats are federal, right? Yeah, those boat guys, they won’t know you on sight, and you don’t want to get the boat police after you. They’re crazy! So tell them “hey, I got a badge, see?” by using these lights in the line of duty as an authorized representative of the law! And then have the other cops come shop at our site as well!

Assuming you’re a cop, of course. Are you a cop? No? Because you have to tell us if we ask you, see. If you’re not a cop, please, don’t use these lights to jump over criminals. Just enjoy them safely, in the privacy of your own home.

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