This is KDDT Radio, with the best interviews with the people who make the music you’ll never bother to hear. Up next, some old blues guy.

We’re in the studio today with Blind Hops Barley, noted blues artist, who recently recorded a tribute album to the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System. Hops, first of all, why do they call you blind, when you’re clearly not blind?

It’s from when I worked as a curtain salesman. My job was to order in the window blinds. That’s where I first used the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System. Everyday, I’d call in them orders until my fingers were a teeny bit sore. And that’s where I learned about pain. Pain like losing only your only phone, which of course would never happen with the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System. Have you ever gone hungry for the last half of the day because the vending machine was broken? I sure have. I sure have. And that’s where my blues comes from.

Now, Hops, you’ve been called “the only bluesman to never get ripped off by the British”. How does that make you feel?

Well, I guess it makes me feel the way I felt the day I came home and caught my woman talking on the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System I bought her. See, she didn’t know that the five handsets give you the freedom to talk from almost any room in your house, even hands free. That sure was great for my friend, No-Hands McTavish. Not because he didn’t have hands, he actually had three hands, he was just really lazy and hated to hold the phone.

Is that why they called him “No-Hands”?

No, they called him “No-Hands” because it’d be rude to call him “Three-Hands”! You can’t tear a friend down by pointing out his shortcomings! That’d be like making a VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System without a phonebook directory that stores up to fifty names! If you saw how happy he got when somebody called him “No-Hands”, you’d understand.

Tell us about why you chose the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System as your subject.

The blues is about loss, see. And that old land line, it’s supposedly going out of fashion. Everybody’s got iThis and digital that in their pockets. Well, the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System has digital too, crystal clear digital technology, but nobody thinks about that. And being forgotten, that’s the blues. The VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System also takes up only one phone jack, most people don’t know that. And ignorance, that’s the blues. The VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System also lets you use the last number redial to find out your woman or your man has been doing you wrong. And that’s definitely the blues. How can you do that with a cell phone? You gonna write the “My Baby Won’t Let Me Read Her iPhone Statement So I Don’t Got No Proof Blues”? Who’s gonna listen to that?

Finally, Hops, how do you feel the trilingual prompts have changed your music?

I remember when my VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System got stuck on French for a little while. I had the “I Can’t Understand What This Word Means Blues” fo’ sho’. But then I figured out how to change it because it was easy. So I sort of never finished that track.

Maybe a b-side later?

Maybe. We’ll do it as an exclusive with you, how’s that?

That’d be great, Hops, just great. Thanks for stopping by. Blind Hops Barley, the bluesman of the VTech 6.0GHz 5-Handset Cordless Phone with Digital Answering System. Up next, we’ve got an interview with Yngwie Malmsteen about anger management techniques, only on KDDT.

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