The sun fought the clouds that morning over the little green house in the Carolina hills. While the human inhabitants fussed about getting ready for work, the household’s three cats lounged around the living room. And as cats will do, they gossiped. Mercilessly.

“Seriously, I don’t know what she sees in him. Always with the loud music, the ham radio, the power tools in the house. What, he can put those big air horns in his Toyota, but he can’t fix her car from when he ran into it with his truck? That was months ago, the bum!”

“Well, have you seen the way he puts on his headphones every time she vacuums? Oh, heaven forbid His Majesty be disturbed by the sound of his girlfriend toiling away. I suppose it would kill him to pick up a broom once in a while. I give it another year, tops, before she throws him out onto the street.”

But Onyx was having none of it. “Velcro, where’s the romance in your soul? Termite, have you noticed the way they check Woot together every morning? Like, today, they probably don’t need that Uniden 2.4GHz Cordless Phone With 4 Handsets & Digital Answering Machine – not even with features like intercom, call transfer, two-way Directlink mode, baby monitoring, and speakerphone. They don’t look at Woot because they need a digital answering machine or Caller ID with 100-number memory. No, for them, sharing the Woot experience is just one more way they express their love. And the couple that Woots together stays together.”

Just then, they heard the man in the next room talking to the woman, his voice quavering with nervousness. And then, they weren’t sure if she laughed or cried, but either way, her intensity was alarming.

“Termite, you speak a little human,” Onyx said. “What did Logan say? Was I wrong – are they breaking up?”

“No, no,” the gray-and-white cat replied, his cynicism melting. “You were right. He said ‘Beth, will you marry me?’”

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