The fun kind of shock, not the getting-the-first-bill-for-your-data-plan kind.

You know what the problem is with the classic “joy buzzer?” Nothing. There’s no problem with it. The problem is with society. No one shakes hands anymore! Everybody’s videoconferencing, or texting, or tweeting at each other, or whatever, and there are too few people out there in the public square pressing the flesh to let you really get your money’s worth with a good old-fashioned “joy buzzer.”

Never fear! You can still give people mild electric shocks for fun. Try this novelty cell phone. It looks real! And it is real, in the sense that it’s not a hallucination or something. But it’s not a working phone. It’s just a decoy to attract telecommunications junkies. When one takes the bait and grabs this phone, hoping to “sext-message” his signif, ZZZT! He gets the ol’ buzzeroni!

What’s that you say? “This is a stupid and mean thing to do to people,” you say? Well, MAYBE YOU’RE RIGHT.

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