I’d like to see the NFL just TRY and suspend me for this.

Look, you people who don’t fight Hexbugs just don’t understand. These robotic creatures were bred for fighting. They love it. They need it. It’s all they know. These Hexbugs can’t be rehabilitated into lovable family pets. Their taste for virtual blood is part of who they are.

Besides, the long tradition of Hexbug fighting holds an important place in my culture. If you’ve ever played Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots, you have no right to criticize.

The hysterical media’s gonna make this HexBug Bridge Battle Habitat Set sound like evil incarnate. They’ll take one superficial look at the two included Hexbug Nanos and they won’t see two ingenious robot bugs that run around on twelve legs and can flip over by themselves. All they’ll see is two helpless victims. I ask you, which side has more respect for these noble beasts?

I invite anyone to visit my Hexbug battle arena, custom-built from the 29 easy-connect pieces in this kit. You’ll come away with a whole new understanding of the sport, and the Hexbugs and people involved in it. Far from exploiting mechanical wildlife, Hexbug fighting is actually a great way to honor it. That’s why I got involved in the sport in the first place.

Also, one more dogfighting conviction and I’ll have to do jail time.

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