Undistinguished. Middling. Run of the mill. Any good thesaurus will have at least a dozen more descriptions of your pedestrian, ordinary, passable existence. You trudge from bed to work to TV to bed, never tasting the transcendent, never daring to sup deeply at the trough of the sublime. When it's all over, what will your prudent moderation have gotten you? Does anybody ever say, on their deathbed, "I wish I’d been more commonplace"?

Grab the brass ring. Rise above the herd. Commit to excellence. Settle for nothing less than the Microsoft Wireless Optical Desktop Elite Keyboard and Mouse. Let's start with the keyboard. Forget the gimmicky special hotkeys and the scroll wheel – you'll really love its great key feel. Not too clicky, not too spongy, just enough feedback to let you know it's there. Nice padded handrest, too – feels just like you’re driving a Jaguar. That's class, Junior.

And then we have the mouse – and oh, what a mouse. Reliable optical sensor. Silent scroll wheel with left-right scrolling. Two programmable thumb buttons, mapped by default to the forward-back buttons on your web browser. Up to 6 months of battery life. And a curvy, hold-me shape that Venus de Milo would kill for. Most of us at Woot have this very suite at our desks, and you can see the impressive results right here every single day.

So the choice is yours. Eke out an unexceptional, tolerable, inoffensive existence as one of millions of drudges, as a mere foot soldier in the grey, inconsequential army of normalcy, or make a date with immortality. He who dares, wins – none more so than he who dares to experience the Microsoft Wireless Optical Desktop Elite Keyboard and Mouse.