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It’s happening. The Feds are closing in on me. First, I was on my way to a very important comic convention when they took away my hair goo at the airport. Without the right hair, my Wolverine costume was a laughingstock. Then they sent my economic stimulus check four days late, just to mess with my head. Now, I learn that they’re taking all broadcast TV off the air, destroying the profitable DVD-piracy business I’d built with my Magnavox MWR10D6 DVD Analog Recorder.
Don’t believe the stories about “freeing up bandwidth” or whatever. The digital mandate is aimed squarely at me, and if you don’t see that, you’re either naive or you’re one of them. See, my super-cheap Magnavox gives me the low overhead I need to turn a profit with pirated DVDs of broadcast TV shows. It’s as easy to use as a VCR, and it has a built-in analog TV tuner. Lost, 24, Viva Laughlin: I was the first one to get DVDs of these hot shows out on the street, literally in my case. Ever bought a bootleg DVD set of a network TV show, and the insert was a photocopied collage of pictures clipped from Entertainment Weekly and Us, with the name of the show printed in Comic Sans? Then you’ve seen my work.
And they’ve never been able to stop me. Until now. Or until February, 2009. That’s when I’ll need a converter box to be able to receive a broadcast TV signal with my Magnavox MWR10D6. Sure, I could send away to the Feds for one of those coupons for $40 off a converter box. I could also just go down to the police station and turn myself in – it’d essentially be the same thing. What, me get cable? That would totally blow my budget.
I know when I’m beaten. You win, Big Brother. I might as well just sell my Magnavox Analog DVD Recorder – I’ll let you have it for, like, thirty-five bucks. This pirate is pulling into port for good…unless anybody out there’s willing to trade a free cable hookup for a complete DVD set of Celebrity Apprentice. Commercials included, at no extra charge!
Warranty: 90 Day Woot Limited Warranty
Features:
Specifications:
In the box:
CONSUMER ALERT: This television receiver has only an analog broadcast tuner and will require a converter box after February 17, 2009 to receive over-the-air broadcasts with an antenna because of the U.S.’s transition to digital broadcasting. Analog-only TVs should continue to work as before with cable and satellite TV services, gaming consoles, VCRs, DVD players, and similar products. For more information, call the Federal Communications Commission at 1-888-225-5322 (TTY: 1-888-835-5322), or visit the commission’s digital-television Web site at: www.dtv.gov.
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