This is clearly not the keyboard I asked for.

What? You’re messing with me, right? I need to be more specific with my requests? I am a Customer Service Representative, pal. What am I supposed to do when someone calls in with a problem? Serenade their woes away? Maybe I can get them to dance so hard that they forget we accidentally charged their credit card twice, huh?

Okay, fine, I am now requesting a regular old QWERTY keyboard and not the M-Audio Apple KeyStudio 25 Keyboard. I do not need 25 full-sized, half action, velocity sensitive keys, MIDI-reassigned Pitch Bend and Modulation control, nor assignable buttons, knobs, slider, and pedal input. I only require something to type words with and I need it, like, NOW, if possible. Is that clear enough?

THREE DAYS! Aren’t you guys just on the next floor up? Fine, you boys wanna play hard ball? I’ll bring my laptop and this M-Audio Apple KeyStudio 25 Keyboard up there and perform the entire works of Barry Manilow until you bring me what I need. No, no, go ahead. Invite HR up there to see it. I’d love to have them in the audience.

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