Sure, these Bluetooth headsets are extremely convenient. They provide hands-free access to your cell phone with controls for answering or rejecting calls, call waiting, last number redial and voice dial right on the headset. They fit comfortably in either ear for hours of comfortable use. Once they’re juiced up, they’re good for up to four hours of yakkin’ or up to 200 hours on standby. We get it, they’re handy.

But come on, they’re not jewelry. When we see some schmuck out to dinner in a loud restaurant—too loud to take a call—and he’s got his extended family ‘round the table and one of these things stuck in his ear? Well, we grieve for the species.

Is the Bluetooth headset supposed to be a status symbol? Because a Mercedes it ain’t. We all but give these things away on a regular basis. So is it supposed to give us the impression that this guy’s a big wheel, a big-time business player who might get an important call about the Henderson Account at any moment?

Because it does not give us that impression. It gives us the impression that he’s a tool.

So by all means, snap these headsets up. Use them. They’re great for when you’re doing the dishes while you talk to mom. But please—please—remember they’re communications accessories, not fashion accessories, OK?

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