A white sun cut black shadows along Main Street. “I wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Sheriff Labtec Silver rasped.

Startled, the trio of bandits turned away from the horse that they were stripping saddle, shoes, and all. They looked at the sheriff. They looked at each other. They looked back at the sheriff. They laughed.

“Or else what, hombrito?” the tall one with bad teeth scoffed.

“You gonna arrest all three of us?” the fat one with bad skin smirked.

“They even let you carry a gun, junior?” the short one with big ears snarled.

As the laughs died away, the sheriff blew a bubble with his gum. When he pulled it away without leaving behind any sticky residue, a ripple of unease went through the outlaws. Sheriff Silver smiled.

“I’ve got three buttons,” he murmured. “I’d rather not use ‘em. But I will.”

The three bandits forced themselves to laugh. “He’s got buttons!” the tall one with bad teeth yelped. “We’ll let you know if we need to – to button something – like our pants, or…” The joke stopped floundering and died on the dusty winds.

Six eyes on one side met two on the other.

Then, as one, the bandits drew. But the Sheriff was already in motion. “I’ve got a button for you” – pying! AAAGGGHHH! – “and one for you” – pyeww! UUUUUUNNNHHH! – “and one for you.” – ptong! GAAAHHH!

Sheriff Labtec Silver decided he was hungry. He stepped over the outlaws toward Belle’s USB Port. With any luck, that was as bad as things would get today.

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