Call me Ishmael. My travels have been long and difficult, but I’m thinking I’ll skip over some of the boring part, if ye don’t mind. Because the story I want to tell was on a very specific ship, under a Captain by the name of Ahab. A man who would have killed us all in the name of the Klipsch Synergy Series SS.5 Surround Sound Speaker.

At the time, we did not know the story of the additional Klipsch center speaker that created his dark obsession. We only knew the lash, and the way he threw out our prostitutes and boxes of cheap rum. Our fate was held to his, and as such, to a solitary course, all in pursuit of the white van, that kept a Klipsch Synergy Series SS.5 Surround Sound Speaker inside.

It was a fearsome thing to hear the Klipsch Synergy Series SS.5 Surround Sound Speaker in action. Even from the crow’s nest, the two 1 inch magnetically shielded polymer compression drivers joined the two side-facing 90º x 60º Tractrix® Horns in a clear, controlled coverage with low distortion. The rumble of the 4 inch shielded woofer made the cabin boy wet himself in fear. The first mate led him away compassionately. We never saw the lad again.

Always the white van stayed in our telescopes, and always the white van was just slightly ahead. Some days we could see the jet ash vinyl veneer of the Klipsch Synergy Series SS.5 Surround Sound Speaker, and we would cheer, and the captain would offer a gold piece for any man who laid a spear against the bumper of the white van. He would curse and mutter, and that is the first we heard of the Klipsch center speaker. Would that we had never! That night Ahab smoked in his cabin, while we men pondered if “would that we had never” was truly a proper sentence. The vote was divided. We played rock paper scissors to see which side had the blessing of the Lord. Sometimes it gets pretty boring at sea.

When we tracked the white van to the tropics, we were as close as we ever came. We could see the Klipsch Synergy Series SS.5 Surround Sound Speaker clearly now, all 5.6”x12.63”x5.43” of it. It was high-quality, designed to be hung on a wall. Ahab shouted that he wanted it for the wall of his tavern, and promised with a great vigor that every man here today would drink for free so long as they gave their all. A great cry of joy was his answer!

As we prepared ourselves, Ahab spoke of courage, and it was then he did tell us the second half of the tale...

As every sailor knows, a good center speaker can greatly increase sound quality, especially since 60% of the average movie soundtrack is located in the center. Our bosses think you aren’t going to notice the three links in the write-up that point you to sellout.woot, where today you’ll find an excellent Klipsch Center speaker that will compliment this product very well. So click here and prove them wrong!

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