Pardon us for cyber-peeing all over the e-party, but “Cyber Monday” strikes us as an especially lame name for ecommerce’s big day. At least the bricks ‘n’ mortar equivalent, Black Friday, has a speck of wit to it, with its dual connotations of apocalypse and profitability. Cyber Monday? Bah, humbug! That name tells us nothing about the day or what it means. You might just as well call it Cipher Monday.

It’s almost enough to make us put away these premium Jabra C820s Noise Cancelling Headphones and save them for a more worthy occasion. We don’t want to sully their pristine sound by associating them with such a limply-named phenomenon. We don’t want the sucking black hole of imagination that is “Cyber Monday” to pull in the Jabra C820s.

But that would be churlish of us. Besides, we need the money. And you need its Active Noise Cancellation, dampening background drones like the hum of the airplane you’re riding, or that didgeridoo that your roommate’s always honking away on. They fit like a pair of headphones that costs twice the price. They sound like a pair of headphones that costs ten times the price. They taste pretty much like any other pair of headphones. You know those earbuds that came with your recent MP3 player purchase from Woot? The super-chintzy ones that sound like a transistor radio got stuck in your skull? The Jabra C820s will send them to the landfill (figuratively, anyway – someone will still have to physically transport them there).

So while we come up with a better alternative to Cyber Monday – Proceed To Checkout Monday? #000000 Monday? Use Your Employer’s Internet Connection To Conduct Non-Work-Related Online Transactions Monday? – we’ll leave you to contemplate the glories of the Jabra C820s Noise Cancelling Headphones. But don’t let us hear you call today Cyber Monday, or we’re taking them back.

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