This HP Pavilion A6230N AMD Athlon 64X2 5600+ Desktop Computer has us scratching our heads. We first planned to reference the Beatles, with HelP or something, but then we had trouble finding “AMD Athlon 64×2 2.8Ghz 5600+ Processor” a rhyme.

So we figured we’d do an 80’s movie, where a 400 Gigabyte SATA Hard Drive skipped school to meet with 3 Gigabytes of PC2-5300 RAM (expandable up to 8 gigs) and spend a day exploring fine dining and art museums. The only trouble with that one, we couldn’t figure out a place to mention the SuperMulti DVD Burner with LightScribe Technology.

Our next plan was the story of a single 6 pin IEEE 1394 Firewire port, an orphan, who battled her way beyond the stars to join up with four wisecracking USB 2.0 ports, a Mouse and a Keyboard, a 10/100 Base-T Ethernet Network Interface, and a 56K Modem, as they fought the dread 15-in-1 Media Card Reader. But that was awful. It read like it was made-for-tv.

In desperation, we even tried a love story between an Integrated Nvidia GeForce 6150 SE Graphics card and a 8 Channel audio ALC 888S chipset and the PCI Express x16 slot that kept them apart, and we set it in World War Two. This one was going pretty good until someone pointed out that we had no place to talk about the Windows Vista Home Premium with Windows Media Center. And we had to tell people that there was a Phone Cord right in the box, as well as a pre-installed copy of Norton Internet Security 2007.

What was left to try? We gave up and called HP Total Care, the 24/7 expert assistance line. HP stands behind every product they make, and sure enough, they suggested we get all meta about it and maybe even get a dirt cheap USB drive for fun.

Now our writing staff can still make the weekly lunchtime round of golf at the Woot Country Club. What more could you ask for in a computer? FORE!

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