What you really want to do is direct. You’ve got some killer footage of this air-boat ride you took through the Everglades in 1989, where the alligators or crocodiles or whatever come right up to the boat – man, it’d be perfect for your feature film idea about a retired, one-eyed sheriff who takes down the entire Medellín cartel. But, you know, making movies is all complicated and stuff, especially now that you gotta do it on a computer or whatever, and you’d need to buy all this expensive equipment, and anyway the Medellín cartel pretty much died out like 20 years ago.

We can’t bring Pablo Escobar back from the dead, but we can strike down those other objections. The Dazzle Digital Video Creator 90 lets you hook up your reg’lar old VCR, camcorder, or DVD player directly to your computer as easily as Vince Vaughn phoned in his performance for Wedding Crashers. Just plug the DVC90 into an open USB port, attach your video source to the S-Video, composite video, and/or audio ports, and use the Pinnacle Studio™ QuickStart editing software to begin crafting your viral cinematic statement. A caveat for you emptors: capture quality is, erm, let’s say “less than hi-def,” and some people may be turned off by the processor-intensive, software-based editing.

But whether you want to archive Junior’s first swear words or impress the YouTube chicks with your PogoBall moves, the DVC90 is clearly the easiest, by far the cheapest, indubitably the Dazzle-est way to go. By the way, if anybody has a copy that ‘80s commercial by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints where the kid considers lying to his mom, then is suddenly surrounded by shadowy song-and-dance men who melodiously warn “When you tell one lie, it leads to another”, we’d love to see it.

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