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No, it’s not the kind of ex-doc who was a little too free with handing out prescriptions. The Creative Labs Xdock Wireless Music System for iPod is just one of over 9,000 dancers in the never-ending conga line of iPod adjuncts that promise to “set your music collection free”, blah blah blah. You know the type: hook your iPod up to one thing, music comes out of another thing. In this case, you dock it in the Creative Labs Xdock Base (or connect another audio players with the 3.5mm connection) and your choons pipe from the Creative Labs Xdock Receiver, sans wires, cords, cables, or conduits of any kind. Please, hold your applause until we’re finished.
But here’s what we want to know: how “Creative” can these “Labs” be if they’re still using the tired old X as a signifier of futuristic hipness? Xdock? X-Fi? Xtreme Fidelity? That’s some straight-up 1999 junk right there, and unlike when you were a kid, 1999 is no longer the future. It happened already, remember? “Hey now, you’re an all-star” and all that crap?
In the interest of lifting the general level of coolness abroad in the land, here’s our take on some potential replacements for X as the new rebel letter.
K: strong in a sort of European way, K is a more grown-up alternative that doesn’t sacrifice energy, like X with its hair combed. The sound is nice and forceful, too. Just imagine it, Creative Labs: “Kdock”. Highly recommended (just don’t use it in threes).
N: visually striking, and a little mysterious. But when spoken, the sound is too subtle, without those satisfying hard edges. And it might just be too common, too pedestrian – the kids need a letter that’ll shock Mom and Dad. Moderately recommended.
V: again, looks good. Easy to scratch into your desk at school, or modify into some sort of lightning bolt. Has some of X’s sense of danger, as Alan Moore understood. But Winston Churchill and Richard Nixon both used to throw this sign long before we were born, so how cool can it really be? Moderately recommended.
Q: sorry, guys, James Bond beat you to this one. Besides, it’s a little too self-consciously kooky, a little too showy about its weirdness, to the point that it starts to get on your nerves: the Andy Dick of the alphabet. Not recommended.
J: the hook shape has promise, and J has served well as the first initial of countless rappers. But if the surfeit of common male J names (John, James, Jason, Josh, Joel, Jeremy, Justin, etc.) didn’t kill it, J-Lo did. Not recommended.
W: ugh. Only a true lame-oid would build a brand identity around this mush-mouthed, over-wide, multisyllabic disaster of a letter. Avoid!
Warranty: 1 Year Creative Labs
Features:
Xdock Connections:
X-Fi Wireless Receiver Connections:
Wireless Specification
iPod Compatibility
In the box:
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